Thursday, July 28, 2011

They DO Exist

by Megan S.

Oompa Loompas.  You probably thought the cryptids were just a product of the fertile mind of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory author Roald Dahl.  I know I did.

Turns out we were wrong.  So very wrong.

The photographic evidence is ASTOUNDING.

I recently uncovered visual proof of the humanoid's existence amongst the George Eastmen House museum's collection of daguerreotypes.  Note the subject's hairstyle and slight orange complexion.

Dated 1850, the image entitled, "Portrait of Young Man in Red Shirt, Smoking a Clay Pipe," is unattributed but one can only assume the handsome young Oompa Loompa's existence was documented by a theobroma cacao aficionado. 

While there is no indication among the photograph's related records if the pipe-smoking cryptid participated in singing the traditional chanteys warning children of the perils of being selfish or thoughtless,  one can safely posit the strapping Oompa Loompa would have heard songs like the following growing up in Loompaland.

Thanks to My Daguerreotype Boyfriend for the photo.  Love your Tumblr!
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  1. Exist? One of them is the current American Speaker of the House.

  2. I beg to differ, Kirkland. Mr Boehner is a pretender to the Oompa Loompa throne. That's self-tanner, not the rosey orange glow of the lovely native peoples of Loompaland.