Friday, March 18, 2011
A Braaaaaaiiiiin for Fashion
Recently, I was browsing a Hot Topic that was going out of business -- as most respectable 33-year-old college professors do -- and I stumbled across the most delightful find: A zombie wallet! With a black satin bow! And what luck; I'd been looking for a new wallet to replace my crumbling one. Plus, it was a bargain at 50% off.
Not long after I bought it, a woman in a bar complimented me on my pretty wallet. I'm thinking that the bar's low lights may have made the zombie's rotted eye sockets look vaguely like roses. That, or this woman had a really odd sense of "pretty."
Anyway, my purchase made me wonder what other zombie accessories for women might exist, and I was delighted to find a whole line that coordinates with my new wallet. Behold:
High heels, a purse and, my personal favorite, zombie flip flops! I adore that they're all decorated with cute satin bows. Sadly, the flip flops are sold out. I would've loved to perfect my rotter shuffle in them.
Obviously, you need a main outfit to wear with your new accessories. May I suggest the Zombie Audrey t-shirt, while you're imbibing your Zombie Defense Serum? (Which is silly, I know. The best defense against zombies is obviously a heavily fenced, fortified concrete building with sustainable food and water resources, scads of medical supplies, and endless ammunition for those head shots.)
What other undead accessories am I overlooking? Direct me to new zombie merch in the comments!